Hello all,
Let me first say that this site is amazing! The obvious and genuine concern that this group has for one another is inspirational, and a welcomed environment for someone like me. To Jeff, I have to say that you are hands-down the man. Just from reading through the forums and articles on this site, I can't help but feel a little better already. I have recently (as of early October 2009) begun experiencing consistent
PVC's and they are literally scaring me into seclusion.
I was recently let go from a job that while I didn't love it, I was relatively invested in. I had been running a non-profit that builds boats with urban youth to build social and academic skill sets in an alternative learning environment. At the time (September 2009), I was the sole employee as there was very little financial resource to go around. To make a long story short, a good friend of mine from a similar field was looking for a job, I recommended that the board of directors hire him as executive director, within weeks we had strong disagreements regarding the use of our limited funds, he convinced the board to fire me, they did.
Shortly thereafter, I began experiencing intense and constant
PVC's for the first time in my life. I'm 28, was a heavy smoker/drinker, a little overweight (6'3"/250lbs.), and my eating habits have been less than stellar. I went to a reputable cardiologist (my wife is a nurse in a good hospital) and had an
ECG and 24-hour holter study. The study came back with 2,200
PVC's. My cardio gave me a very low dose of Lopressor which I never took (I'm sort of afraid of medicine). Shortly after the test, my
PVC's just went away completely. It was like that until Christmas eve, when they kicked up again full steam. At that time, I had an
echo and nuclear stress-test performed.
The
echo revealed a "slightly enlarged" right heart, the nuk was normal, and the stress test (though I had a few during the excersise) was "good". Right after that test (about three weeks ago), my
PVC's disappeared for exactly one week, and have returned to date with some episodes of
bigeminy and
trigeminy.
I am desperate to deal with this in some sort of productive way. I feel terrified - literally TERRIFIED - most of the time. The cardio, my primary, and my wife insist that though this is new and feels "uncomfortable", I am perfectly safe. The thing is, I literally feel like I might die any second! I've spent SO much money on ER copays in the last few months it's crazy. Everytime I go, the story is the same, "Yep. You have
PVC's. There's nothing to be done. You're fine."
I am writing this (and sorry so long) because the anxiety is uncontrolable. I am crippled and feel like there is no hope of enjoying my life. This intense fear of death keeps me from sleeping, from working on my business, from seeing friends, from simply living my life!
I've dramatically reduced my smoking (1/2 pack per day), cut out all caffeine and alcohol, reassure my self as much as possible, but just can't get through this. I used to love my life, but it's slipping through my fingers as this condition is consuming me. The worst part is that everyone just keeps telling me I'm fine, but the palps won't stop and all I can think about is
VT and what if I'm alone when it happens - or asleep - or driving - or...
In anycase, I just wanted to introduce my self, and put my pathetic situation out there so that you with more experience may have some words of wisdom. I really appreciate this site, I appreciate the open-ness in the forums, and I hope to be able to add to it in some way.
Thank You for reading...
Justin