It's awful to live in fear like this. I see a Cardiologist tomorrow (Monday) at 1:00pm and I'm terrified of having another episode before I get there. Not that a consultation is going to make things better, but it'll be a start.

The last time I went through this whole heart rhythm thing I was a teenager and I don't recall the process very well. I was also more ignorant of heart issues back then.

Now I just wish that I could go in and they could run tests before sending me home. Waiting sucks. Maybe they'll at least be able to get me on a decent monitor before I leave so that if someone happens, they can catch it.

In the meanwhile, I'm alone today and pretty much winding myself up into a tizzy waiting for my fiance to get home or my dad to get here in the next hour or so. I used to love alone time. Now I dread it like nothing else.

Ugh. Days off used to be the highlight of my week, now I would rather be at work all day every day because at least I'm only 2 minutes from a hospital there.